This week has been rough. It was the last of week of the quarter, and filled with writing evaluations, crazy long field trips, more evaluations, grading, laundry, and did I mention evaluations? I’m ready for a break. Especially a break that actually feels like fall. We are headed to Chicago, and I couldn’t be happier. Well….I could, if my evaluations were done. I’m working on it.
This is why I have been MIA. It’s because all my writing energy and creative thoughts are being poured into the 210 paragraphs I
have to get to write about my students. While this task is time consuming and tedious, it also forces me to get to know these 30 humans that I teach everyday in a way that I probably wouldn’t otherwise. I am forced to look for their love of learning, their hidden efforts, their wonderment, and their depth of inquiry. I am forced to look deeper and more thoroughly at who they are as a person and as a developing student than I otherwise would be. I am forced to look beyond test and homework grades to find the unique soul and learner they truly are. Of course, this might make this process sound glamorous, and it isn’t. It’s hard and time-consuming, yet I hope that one day a teacher looks at my children that way. I hope they see beyond a number on a paper or a percentage from some standardized test to find the individual person within the class that they teach. I know for me it’s hard to remember that I don’t teach a class; I teach 30 individual and unique children. Le sigh.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my job, but sometimes I feel as if I spend more time with my work than I do with my children. Or perhaps I feel like I am giving so much of myself, my time, my efforts to children that aren’t my own, while I have little left for my family. And yet, I love my students. And I love giving to them too. I guess the situation is just best described with the Facebook relationship status of “It’s Complicated.”
All of this has left me super ready to spend time with my kids and my family. Charlotte has been talking about going on a plane to see Daboo (my mom), Dapee (my dad), Juju (Dean’s mom) and Pops (Dean’s dad). Oh, she keeps talking about the new Tigeys she will be receiving after losing the others – I mostly hear about this. (*UPDATE both the Mommy Tigey and the sister Tigey are lost now.) We will be getting family pictures taken while in Chicago, seeing cousins, and prancing (I will prancing) around an apple orchard. Oh I can taste the apple cider donuts now.
But I’m not there yet. Soon. So soon. Until then, I type on.